That calms me down and makes me feel like somebody else is in control. Maybe that sounds non-erotic, but it's very erotic for me to feel vulnerable and open to letting somebody else do things for me. In my regular life, I have a ton of responsibility; I make decisions all the time.
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My submission means I'm choosing to release control for a limited amount of time, and that feels like a burden being lifted. It's made me less anxious, happier, and more fulfilled. As a feminist, I value the chance to say exactly what I want and get it. My submission is a way of doing that; it's a performance of my sexual and gender identity. I think of myself as femme because this is my choice to enact my femininity. You don't want the dominant who's like Richard Gere in Pretty Woman , all "I'm gonna dress you up and you do your hair like this and then you're perfect for me.
Type keyword s to search. Today's Top Stories. Hot Girl Summer Is Over. Fat Bear Fall Is Here. Caroline Calloway's Next Act? Visual Artist. Your Guide to the Democratic Primary Debates. Morrigan McCarthy. Advertisement - Continue Reading Below. More From Fifty Shades of Grey. Jamie Dornan Talks Stripping Down. I was initially shocked, and yet it made perfect sense. That was our connection.
I messaged him: "I didn't know you had this side of you. Wink, wink. At first, we casually texted, catching up on each other's lives. He'd finished an Ironman triathlon, and I'd started working on a business plan to venture out on my own.
8 Ways To Be Submissive In Bed When You're Just Starting To Experiment With Being Dominated
Our shared interest in BDSM came up slowly, in e-mails and on the phone. He'd joke about making me scream, and I'd say, confidently, "Bring it. I learned that BDSM is about more than rough sex. While a Dominant, or "Dom," may have the "power," he can only go as far as his submissive, or "sub," will let him. It's not abuse; it's consensual. Doug would text, "How do you feel about a belt?
Could you trust me to do anything to you? We settled on opposite sofas, and I was a fidgety, nervous mess. What if I didn't like the pain as much as the idea of it?
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Then Doug stood up, towering over me, and grabbed a fistful of my hair. He ordered me to perform oral sex, but that first time wasn't really about sex, it was about seeing if I'd be obedient. He used a belt, leaving welts on my back, thighs, and bottom.
I could hear him pacing behind me, but I never knew when the lick of leather was coming. It hurt like hell, but I was utterly turned on. I had no control.
And I loved it. Afterward, I cried, overwhelmed by how raw it all was. We met up a couple more times for similar sessions, but then I pulled away. I was freaked out. Not by the pain, but by how intense my feelings were for him. Nearly two years passed before I saw him again. We had both gotten married, gotten on with our lives. My husband and I renovated our house.
I traveled to India and Australia with friends. And my business boomed. Meanwhile, I tried to suppress this thing between Doug and me. When Doug texted that he was moving to Boston for a big promotion, I agreed to meet him for a drink. I told my husband, with whom I share a very honest relationship, that I was going to see an ex for closure. But as soon as Doug and I laid eyes on each other, that dark connection was still there. He walked me to my car, and we kissed. Then he told me to take off my pants. I obeyed. We were right back in it.
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He left for Boston with his wife the next morning. Rhyming Dictionary: Words that rhyme with submissive. Spanish Central: Translation of submissive. Nglish: Translation of submissive for Spanish Speakers. Britannica English: Translation of submissive for Arabic Speakers. What made you want to look up submissive?click
How Far Can You Make It As A Submissive?
Please tell us where you read or heard it including the quote, if possible. Test Your Knowledge - and learn some interesting things along the way. Subscribe to America's largest dictionary and get thousands more definitions and advanced search—ad free! A guide to the associated terms. Words for the shy and bashful.
A note on extended meanings. You all would not have guessed some of these. Some imitative words are more surprising than others. How to use a word that literally drives some people nuts. The awkward case of 'his or her'.